Week Four: Aspirations

So this week I had a really hard time with this. Everytime I would think about it I would come up almost blank, except that I just wanted to be happy in the end. It was like no it can't be my mom, my brothers.. eh. They've done a lot to be proud of, but to aspire me .. just didn't feel it. My dad, I respect him so much. He's a hard worker and just always there for me if I ever asked, but I don't:) haha! Then there's my sister. Almost again like my brothers, love em to death, but my aspirations I wanted to think of on how to get me to a better life.

Then it hit me. My aspirations are all of you. How strong you are. How much you care for others when your also worrying about yourself. That you put a lot into others to help with their issues, my issues. :) And how much fight you all have in you. That everyday regardless, you still pick yourself up and go. Might be hard but you do it! That you have the desire and the willing to fight.

Some I have found have made it thru the challenges others we are challenging it. Not everyday is it good, or every moment. But in the long run I feel that there is no one else I'd rather make this change with! That somehow someway we will pull thru and in the end we'll be able to look back and see how much we grew helping each other, holding each other up, laughing and smiling with another.

With that said :) Loves to you all!! We'll keep on fighting and growing together! WE WILL DO THIS!

Week Three: My Influences

Probably my biggest influence is my dad. He's always had a positive outlook and just smiles. But I also feel like he hides a lot under that smile. My dad has always made me laugh. Maybe it's cause I'm spoiled by him to lol! I remember one time. I got blaimed for my brother breaking something and my dad was supposed to spank me 10 times. I was crying before he even bent me over his knee. He said he was only going to give me one and just to continue to cry so that my mom 'bought it'. Somehow from that day on.. he was in my corner. I should have trusted him more, unfortunately I didn't.

My other influence is my sister. God I love her more then I know. She has ALWAYS been there for me. I know that in a heartbeat if I needed her she'd do whatever she could to make it happen. I can count on being honest with her without her judging me or being I guess rude. She's just there. And it really is a great thing to know that and to feel loved by her.

Another influence is my husband. He has stood by me for the past 8 years when he could have easily walked away. He does everything that he can and I appreciate him more then he'll probably ever know.

The last influence is just the world. The beauty of it. Looking at the sky and getting lost and in the calm. Hearing rain or the wind blowing the the trees. I love standing outside and feeling the wind blowing around me. Just everything that is just there to be there.. I really enjoy that.

All of these influences give me hope. It makes me feel that I am WORTH IT. That I can have a good and loving life as long as I put the effort into it.

Week Two: Favority ChildHood Memories

So My favorite childhood memories..
I actually have a few. More like a lot, only cause I chose to remember those times that I smiled instead of those that I cried.

One of my favorite times was going in the field with my dad and brother. We'd always go out and feed the cows and just check on them. But it was just such a quite peaceful environment. Then my brother (who is 5 yrs older then me) started doing these 'dares'. He and I would at different times jump out of the back of the pick up and wait for so long before we'd run and jump back in. Well.. one time Bob jumped out and waited until we were probably about 50 ft ahead.. no if you that don't know.. when your in the field you drive pretty slow, 5 mph. So Bob takes off running and about that time my dad steps on the gas picking it up to maybe 10/15 mph so we are like leaving Bob in the dust and I have to jump up and bang on the window to tell dad to stop. I really enjoyed that day for some reason.

Laughing is my big thing. It gives me such a wonderful feeling. That's why now I love my boys so much and making them smile and laugh, and really enjoy life.

Week One: What is Beauty?

“God places the heaviest burden on those who can carry its weight.”

What is beauty? Some might say it is your hair, your eyes, your shape. I think of beauty when it is something that is just there. Going for a walk and just listening to sounds. Whether it's the wind blowing through the trees or grass or it's the birds talking. I absolutely love the skies they are to me the most gorgeous creation God did.

Laughter is also the greatest thing. Smiling at someone to have them smile back and just know that some how in some way you might have touched them. That to me is beautiful! Hearing kids laugh cause they are being silly not giving two cents on worrying about how someone thinks of them or even then what will be in the next minute.

At this point I do not even agree with beauty within the eyes of the beholder. God created us.. we are all beautiful because God gave us life.