Friday, September 28, 2012

Week 38: Time

Where my time has gone?? Lord it feels like it came and went in a blink of an eye. I don't seem to know who I am what I want or where I'll be anymore. I honestly feel lost.

I started my so called journey about 2 yrs ago and it's caused me to go in a direction that I really don't like. I try to stay positive and think that you have to hit a rock bottem to be able to move forward, it's just now I don't know how much farther I have to go to hit it.

So this last year has caused me a lot of heartache. I've had many problems. Some are health wise, other finances, and others that I would rather not go into detail about. Pretty much embarrassing and not something I would like to go into detail about.

Basically it put me in this place or this title of a person that I know I am not and it's really hard to know I somehow am like in that category. And I got a lot of blame for something that I feel like I am partially responsible for but not solely.. so that makes it harder to deal with.

Well, so where have the time gone.. I have no idea.. where I am.. I feel stuck and lost and a bit confused on what to do next. Actually that's somewhat wrong. I know what I should probably do but I'm just not so willing to do it. At least not yet.

Okay so, this world is going by faster and faster for me and I feel more and more consumed by it. I'm not really sure how to change that or what to do.. I just keep praying that something will open my eyes and things will change.