Sunday, June 24, 2012

Week 33: Prized Possession

To be honest. All of the possessions that I have had or received or been rewarded whatever it was how I got them. I could careless about them.

I have a box filled of my medals I got from Basketball, Volleyball, and Track. (also plaques) And awhile ago I wanted to throw them away but Tom said I should keep them. Honestly all they do is bring me back to a life that I no longer live or have. If anything it brings me down because they remind me how I should have been 'more'. How I should have pushed that much harder or done something different. They don't make me feel proud.

I really don't know what my most prized possession would be. Mainly because too that means that I own it. I guess if there's anything that I would consider would be my personality. Not that's it's a great one or anything like that. But it is who I am. And I'm proud to be ME. I'm not right I'm not perfect by any means and I f*ck up a lot. But I am me. I'm true to who I am. And for that I would then say that's my most prized possession. You get what you see and if you don't like it then you can walk away. But it is what it is. I don't try to fool anyone, I just am who I am.

So ya.. that's my most prized possession. Me.

Monday, June 11, 2012

Week 32: My dad

As for an Inspirational person, without it's my dad!

Now can I say that he didn't embarrass me growing up, oh hell ya he did. My parents were the 'old' parents. Everyone else parents were like in the late 30's maybe 40's but mine were pushing 50 and 60. So it was just like they were so old fashion and really annoying.

But my dad .. looking back now I'm amazed by him. He gave me so many aspects of myself that I am proud of that I look at him and just smile. He is a terrible hard worker. And he gets hurt a lot .. and when I say a lot I mean  A LOT! But he always some how gets back up and continues again.

He also just puts himself out there. If you need help it doesn't matter who you are he'll help. My mother yelled at him for helping out certain ppl growing up. Mainly because they wouldn't be able to repay it back, but dad never cared. He'd just let mom go ranting and raving, usually just laugh or giggle but he still would help out those ppl. And that's something I've taken and ran with. Like just getting food for the homeless or giving them some money, and if they are just scamming me (which I do know some ppl do) well I'm doing something that is out of kindness, so fine go ahead and be an ass. I'm doing something that I should do.

My dad tho, he's really remarkable. I don't know how he does it. I've never understood a lot of it. Why he stood by my mom for so long (considering she's just a screaming bitch). How for years he works for 12+ hrs during the summer time. You can not keep that guy down. He'll be turning 79 here in a bit over a week and he broke 7 ribs, scratched his lung, and fractured part of his back, yet the guy is now trying to get like 'back on the horse'. There's nothing that can keep him down.

And he's not like overly emotional, but when he tells me he loves me I know it .. I feel it .. plus too he usually tears up. :)

I wished I was more like him and not so much like my mom. Or at least took on her reactions to things. I wished I would have saw more of how he reacted and been like that. But he was gone a lot working so ..

Well I love my daddy:) What can I say hah

Tuesday, June 5, 2012

Week 31: Smile

The reason why I like this is because half the time I feel like I'm just smiling because you just have to smile. And I'll smile when I feel uncomfortable at times. But then there's those moments that you are truly smiling and there's this overwhelming feeling of how peaceful and wonderful things are. 

One thing that makes me smile is my sister. When I see her I want to cry, I miss her a lot and she's a wonderful person that I only wished to have an ounce of who she is. 

My kids make me laugh. They usually make me laugh tho on the one side of like omgosh really this is what I brought into the world!?  haha:) They are pains but they also know how to just have fun with me and just be .. just be. 

Then there's when I'm out in the sun away from everyone and everything. That peace of quite. Like the kids could even be yelling at each other and I can just sit there and smile. There's something about just like being there and not having to worry about this or that. 

That's why I'm so looking forward to Thursday. I've already started packing. Which is probably best because then I won't be freaking out. I usually like to pack early and Tom doesn't like it, but guess what I don't care right now! If it helps me to be okay then that's what I'm going to do. 

The other part of smiling that I like, is that when you smile at someone that you don't know and they actually smile back it's like a nice warmth of maybe it just made their day better, cause I feel good now, so hopefully they do as well. 

So smile away. =) Make someone laugh and just feel it.